The first thing either of them thought of was food. Since this was a crisis situation, they decided to go for pizza, so ordered a huge everything-you-can-fit-on-it pizza from the local shop. Meanwhile, they set about creating a solution to their problems.

Their first solution was gin and tonic, and they found this needed much testing. Soon, they were slightly merry, and Chris put forward a plan.

"Underground," he said.

"Overground, Wombling free...", Dave started to hum in a amused fashion.

"No, underground, black market, we can sell fried food secretly to everyone and make a bomb."

"Great idea - sounds highly illegal, but as long as no-one can work out where we live and supply food from, we're ok."

At that moment, the doorbell rang. "Good grief, they've been listening at the door."

"Pizza!"

"Phew. Hello, thanks," said Dave, as he received the food. He paid the man, and took the pizza into the kitchen. Chris unwrapped it and placed it into the big pan on the hob which he'd just been warming up, and let it sizzle for a bit before it was suitable to eat.

They continued their discussion as they ate the pizza and did some fried bread (seemed a shame to waste the oil). "How about that miserable place by the coast, near that awful factory?" suggested Chris.

"It should mask the smell easily enough with the yuk that factory chucks out," mused Dave, "and the police wouldn't think of looking there for us".

"Unless they were hungry..."

"I suppose we can let the majority of them know about us, as long as we know they're real customers. After all, they're hardly likely to report us when we're their best supply of decent food."

"How are we going to make it all work?" wondered Chris, "We could do with someone who's got some idea about dodgy goings-on. Someone we can use to ensure we don't get found out, and who can pass the word around for us so we don't draw suspicion."

"How about an amazing blond genius who is so popular he will be expected to be seen talking to everyone, and has acute business sense after years of dealing with record companies?" queried Dave as a bulge appeared in his cheek due to increased tongue pressure.

Chris smiled inanely but had to agree that Matt was the ideal choice of colleague for the venture. Matt had been a guitarist with Dromedary, the band Chris also used to be involved with. Dromedary had been chosen as the name because it 'sounded good'. The relevance of a one-humped camel to a band was indistinct, but it had become apparent that Matt was the hump, for he was an almost endless supply of energy to the band, which went for days on end without doing much. Eventually the band folded after Matt's continued optimism for obtaining a record deal had succeeded in getting them nothing more than a few laughs. The experience had left Matt quite mad, and he and his blond hair had turned to crime as a way of coping; the pair had made quite a living since through such abominations as fraud, robbery, deception, and appearing as Brett in Neighbours.

"Great idea, Dave, I'll contact the hump tomorrow morning."