Once upon a time, a long long time ago, in the past, in a far off land, a long long way away in the distance, there was a man. But we really don't care, because this story is about a completely different man who lived not quite so long ago, and not quite so far away, and was called Ian.

Now Ian was a fearful man - 7 feet tall, with long hair and a bright flowery shirt. No reason for him having a flowery shirt, except perhaps to scare off potential friends. Which he did quite badly, because he was very popular (though this was due mainly to the fact that he owned the big sweet shop down the road).

Ian was an adventurous man, and got bored easily, hanging around some while ago and some way away, so he decided to go on an adventure to find the land of nod.

Not having ever heard of the land of nod, he thought this a little difficult, but strived to find it and complete his new found mission. So he started by going to the local travel office which was called Travvel4dummies. Ian didn't know what the name meant, but chose that shop because he fancied the girl in the shop.

He looked round for a long while, but, unable to find a while, especially not a long one, decided to leave. However, he was not completely upset, because the shop girl agreed to go out to lunch with him.

So next day, Ian met up with her, and they went off together to the restaurant, where they met up with her boyfriend, and Ian ordered his take away, and - well - took it away.